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A look at scenarios for the 2012 season

Prediction: Jemile Weeks will lead the league in helmet loss. (Photo by Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images)

Jed Jacobsohn - Getty Images

Prediction: Jemile Weeks will lead the league in helmet loss. (Photo by Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images)

It seems as if ANers are split when they think about the 2012 season.

Some want the Athletics to completely, 100 percent stink and go for that No. 1 draft pick.

Some still want the A's to remain competitive, maybe making a reach toward .500.

Some of you can only picture the season ending one way: with Brandon McCarthy, fueled by the tears of Giants fans, dancing an Irish jig on top of a panda hat after securing the final out of the 2012 World Series at AT&T Park.

So I brainstormed some possible scenarios, thinking of what this season could look like.

Star-divide

1. "Not in your wildest alcoholic nightmare would you ever imagine such events unfolding!" — Bill King

  • In Spring Training, Brandon McCarthy injures a ligament in his right thumb tweeting a reply to Dallas Braden, who posted something insane from the trainer's table. McCarthy misses Opening Day and Guillermo Moscoso becomes the A's No. 1 starter by default.
  • Bud Selig and MLB decides to enact a world-wide blackout for the A's/Mariners Japan series, out of fear of embarrassment that people from other countries will believe that these are the best teams from America. In a press conference broadcast by ESPN, Selig says the day after the Japan series that only the Red Sox and Yankees will go overseas in the future.
  • Moscoso forgets that lucky clover he always had in his back pocket last season and his numbers regress to the mean.
  • Jemile Weeks is A's only All-Star after Ron Washington gets confused during roster selection, thinking he was Rickie.
  • Coco Crisp tears a knee ligament in May, is out for the season.
  • Brandon Allen, shuffling between first base, left field and designated hitter, leads the A's in home runs — with 15. Chris Carter leads the team in strikeouts, with a Custian 168.
  • Michael Choice converts to Scientology and believes that baseball does too much damage to his thetan levels, so he retires.
  • The A's offense is just as bad as advertised. Combined with league-average pitching, the A's finish 62-100, good enough for last place. However, the Pirates were even worse, going 59-103, earning the top draft pick.
  • Billy Beane selects a defensively challenged first baseman/DH in the first round of the MLB Draft.

2. Realistic

  • Dallas Braden's rehab goes a little faster than scheduled, and he is inserted into the A's rotation in late April.
  • The A's don't completely embarrass themselves against Felix Hernandez and the Mariners, losing Opening Night in Japan 3-1. Daric Barton drives home Coco Crisp with an RBI double to provide Oakland's only offense.
  • Instead of completely collapsing, Guillermo Moscoso and Brandon McCarthy kind of prove that their 2011 seasons were no fluke. As the new staff ace, McCarthy responds by going 12-10 on the season with an ERA somewhere around 3.50.
  • Grant Balfour, with 12 saves by the All-Star Break, is chosen as Oakland's All-Star representative, helping to fill out the AL bullpen. MLB makes sure not to have Balfour miked up. There are children present, after all.
  • While the pitching, led by McCarthy, is roughly league average, the offense really is as bad as advertised. Michael Taylor, Brandon Allen and Chris Carter don't quite pan out, averaging seasons of roughly 1 to 1.5 WAR each.
  • Jemile Weeks proves to be the best hitter on the team, posting a 2.7 WAR season. Daric Barton improves from his horrid 2011 season, proving to be a nice surprise at 2.1 WAR.
  • The A's don't lose 100 games, but still finish last in the AL West, earning a top-10 draft pick.
  • Sonny Gray gets a September call-up, putting together two or three quality starts while auditioning for the 2013 rotation. Michael Choice ends the season at AAA Sacramento.

3. Optimistic

  • Dallas Braden's rehab is ahead of schedule, and he is able to participate with the team in Spring Training. He is deemed healthy enough and ready to be the Opening Day starter.
  • With a 9-6 record at the All-Star break, Brandon McCarthy is named the A's All-Star representative. Jemile Weeks makes it onto the team as a reserve after an injury to someone on the team.
  • Chris Carter doesn't exactly break out, but he does well enough to own the designated hitter position, hitting 20 home runs, though only batting .250.
  • 2012 Daric Barton posts something closer to 2010 Daric Barton.
  • Tom Milone, a crafty lefthander the A's got in the Gio Gonzalez trade, proves to be a nifty pickup, winning 12 games and posting a FIP somewhere around 3.80.
  • Grant Balfour racks up 16 saves by the trade deadline, is dealt for a high-A hitting prospect. Coco Crisp is traded to a team whose centerfielder suffered a year-ending injury.
  • Collin Cowgill plays a passable centerfield after Crisp's trade, puts up a 2.3 WAR season, shows potential for 2013.
  • With the return of Joey Devine and the development of Fautino de los Santos, the A's finish the season with an envious 8th-and-9th inning combination.
  • The A's still have no chance of competing with Anaheim or Texas, but show that hey, maybe the young guys don't suck that bad, going 81-81.
  • Best hitter: Jemile Weeks, 3.1 WAR. Best pitcher: Brandon McCarthy, 5.0 fWAR. Rookie of the Year candidate: Tom Milone, 12-11, 3.88 FIP, 4.15 ERA.
  • Billy Beane wins the last game of the season. Just not the postseason.

4. "Just plain crazy!" — Bill King

  • Texas fails to come to an agreement with Yu Darvish, also whiffing on Prince Fielder.
  • God finally completes that trade with Oakland for Grant Desme by sending Tim Tebow as a player to be named later.
  • Dallas Braden named Opening Day starter, out-duels Felix Hernandez in a 1-0 perfect game win. Brandon Allen hits a solo home run in the third inning. The Japanese build a Brandon Allen statue outside of the Tokyo Dome.
  • Brian Fuentes is told the game is really in the Seibu Dome, not the Tokyo Dome. After misplacing his passport, Fuentes is left in Japan for the 2012 season.
  • Brandon McCarthy is named the All-Star game starter, possessing a 9-2 record with a 2.31 ERA by the break. Jemile Weeks, Brandon Allen, Chris Carter and Grant Balfour are also on the team.
  • The Angels find out that Albert Pujols is actually 41, not 31. Because of the falsified birth certificate, Anaheim refuses to honor the contract, cutting him and releasing him onto the open market. The Marlins finally sign him, keeping Pujols away from the AL.
  • Chris Carter and Brandon Allen become the all-natural 2012 version of the Bash Brothers. Carter finishes with 41 home runs, Allen with 37.
  • Jemile Weeks leads MLB in triples, stolen bases and helmet loss.
  • With new mechanics taught by McCarthy, ridding himself of the inverted W, Tyson Ross returns and shows his potential, winning 15 games.
  • The A's seize a weakened AL West, winning the division and going on a miracle run. Sensing big money for a sequel, principal photography on Moneyball II starts in August.
  • After both the A's and the Giants make it to the World Series, Bud Selig declares that the winner of the Fall Classic wins territorial rights to Santa Clara County.
  • Southpaw Tim Tebow, who won 7 games out of the bullpen with a 3.16 ERA, saves the final game of the World Series for Oakland.
Tebowa_medium
Sorry, Raiders fans! Don't hate me!



Poll
Which scenario do you see playing out for the 2012 A's?
1. "Not in your wildest alcoholic nightmare would you ever imagine such events unfolding!" — Bill King
51 votes
2. Realistic
154 votes
3. Optimistic
69 votes
4. "Just plain crazy!" — Bill King
83 votes
Other (comment)
6 votes

363 votes | Poll has closed

1 recs  |  47 comments

Comments

3. doesn't sound like a .500 team unless you've left out some other good performances

More like a 72 win team.

in 3

how could barton become the ‘barton of 2010’ and post less than a 3.1war? Wouldn’t he sorta by assumption post something similar to his 5.1fWAR from that year?

Well, I meant closer to his 2010 season (and I was using bWAR)

Should’ve specified, will do now.

Neither here nor there...

But here’s a good story about what’s likely the end of Dan Johnson’s career:

http://www.startribune.com/sports/twins/mlb/137218423.html

What’s left out is that by the time he arrived on the A’s, a lot of people thought he’d be a AAAA player. But boy, talk about bad luck….

always liked Dan

tough run w/ the injuries, but glad he made a couple million and hasn’t squandered it. use it as an investment tool and feed your family. stand up guy

didn't he have some horrible sinus infection that somehow required surgery?
Well, atl least if it's the end of his career

he went out with a bang. That was one of the greatest games I’ve ever watched.

Good post YY

I was wondering partway through if the last scenario was going to have Desme waking up for early prayers one morning and saying “WTF, I’m going back to baseball.” The gold cap rim on Tebow looks like a halo.

Thanks!

And wow, didn’t even notice that… it kinda does.

Hate Tebow

So I don’t want him on my team under any circumstances.

I don’t want us to suck.

But I don’t want us to play any players that don’t have any upside.

So I didn’t want Coco. Put Cowgill out there and let’s see if he can play center. Or Reddick.

Answer some damn questions about the guys who are question marks. If Taylor and Carter can’t play in the majors then cut ’em loose.

The gutted the team, so I don’t want to see any half-assed veterans out there eating up dollars we could spend on the draft or the IFA market, or investing in buyouts for our younger guys.

I chose #2...guess it's realistic

under no circumstances would I ever root for my team to have the worst record in baseball, not even for the #1 pick. After all, I will be in the stands and want to watch good baseball, even if they lose more than they win. But hey, that’s me…

Um... this is amazing
Brian Fuentes is told the game is really in the Seibu Dome, not the Tokyo Dome. After misplacing his passport, Fuentes is left in Japan for the 2012 season.
That part is hilarious
I laughed for a solid 30 seconds.
"Dallas Braden's rehab goes a little faster than scheduled, and he is inserted into the A's rotation in late April."

I thought you said this was going to be realistic?

I thought that late April

was kind the tentative target if everything goes well?

I'm just joking. I think Braden is cursed.
I know Beane wants to round out the rotation

but this is ridiculous.

Well it isn't Ponson so Wiers doesn't have to light himself on fire at least
davidwiers
If the A’s sign Sidney Ponson, I will light myself on fire.
Billy's just thinking of the AN headline writers

He’s teeing up easy poop jokes AND fat jokes.

Athletics sign Bartolo Colon (A Sunsweet Prunes sponsored post!)
Everyone is overreacting to the Bartolo Colon news.

Colon hasn’t even been signed yet, but if he does sign, he could hold Brett Anderson’s rotation spot until the trade deadline. Colon will be dealt. Roy Oswalt is more expensive and is a bigger injury risk, and Colon was pretty close to being as good as Oswalt was last season. In my opinion, these negotiations aren’t a big deal.

Let's see what happens when he doesn't have fat cells injected into his elbow

Oswalt is 4 years younger and has had a far better career. Colon had some excellent years with the Indians and White Sox in the early 2000s/late 90s, but the last time he threw more than 100 IP before last year was in 2005 with the slegnA.

Ya but Oswalt will have better options than Oakland.

He makes any contending team better.

And Colon will probably be dead by the trade deadline...
Fine, we'll have to trade him in May then.
haha love that just plain crazy scenario
Bartolo Colon to start opening day...

YESS!!! < /sarcasm >

Athletics Negotiating with Bartolo Colon

Why not Colon?

Cheaper than Oswalt, innings eater (ha ha!) and it worked for the Yankees, why wouldn’t it work for us?

the only reason

it worked for the yankese was that their offense puts up 7 runs a game so colon could give up 3 or 4 runs no such luck here in oakland

Innings (among other things) eater
Prediction

1. Bad, ugly, depressing baseball.
2. Empty seats
3. Disparaging remarks about the city of Oakland.
4. Excuses by Beane and Ownership, execept “We don’t draft well…”
5. No resolution on San Jose.
6. Underperformance by position prospects
7. Decent pitching

Also

Why is Michael Taylor wasting his time working as an intern on KNBR? Shouldn’t he be working out and spending every other waking minute in the batting cage? Winter leagues? Giants conspiracy I say.

Maybe he's thinking about life after baseball. It's probably not that far away for him.
He should be working on baseball

I agree. This is a bad move on his part.

Do you spend every waking moment trying to become better at your career?

Why are you posting online? You could be working right now. Baseball is a game you can only play for a limited amount of time. I see nothing wrong with the internship. He’s smart, maybe he wants to have some kind of career after he’s out of the game. It’s not like he’s doing this during the season.

I don't hate Tebow...

but seeing him in an A’s uni made me throw-up a little.

Kind of like when some dude a while back tried to convert a SJ Giants uni into a SJ A’s uni. Nasty… and not the good pitching kind.

Great Post

All of your scenarios are creative and entertaining. I’m of course hoping for the WS victory.

Tebow could solve the attendance and stadium issues
I think that bubble just burst
I enjoyed the post, Yon.
I Realize This Is Off-Topic,

But I’m hearing rumors that the A’s might have a deal with Bartolo Colon. Does anybody have some sort of confirmation on this?

Apparently he has signed with a "mystery team" (could be us)

but won’t say which team until he passes his physical. Which, I might add, is not a “gimme,” in that my Aunt Bertha is in better shape (but in fairness doesn’t throw as hard).

Seeing Tebow in an A's jersey

Just made me throw up.

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